Pursuit to Happiness | Episode 10
What's up everybody? Welcome to Riding the Wave podcast with your host, AYD and MJ in the house.
AYD:Welcome everybody.
MJ:Welcome back to a new episode. We hope everybody had a productive, great, week weekend, going on to the weekend.
AYD:Yes. What's, today? What's today's episode about?
MJ:Oh, man.
AYD:Today's episode's
MJ:is gonna be a doozy. It's gonna be a doozy. Today, we're gonna talk about the pursuit to happiness, not the movie. The realization of the pursuit to happiness. But first things first
AYD:We gotta cheers.
MJ:We gotta do the cheers. Ting, cling. Cheers to you guys.
AYD:Cheers to everybody out there listening.
MJ:Again, I just wanna I just wanna thank everybody for tuning in, and and subscribing, leaving likes, leaving comments.
AYD:Is this your shout out right now?
MJ:We really appreciate we really appreciate you guys, your support. Yes, definitely. And and and everything like that. Any shout outs, Aid?
AYD:You know, I would just wanna give a shout out to all the people out there, you know. It's the weekend, but remember, whatever goals you're working on, continue to work on it. I know we wanna chill and just be relaxed and kick back, but, you know, we still gotta hit those goals. We still gotta put in work for ourselves. So let's get after it.
AYD:You guys got it, you know. We appreciate all you guys. So the shout outs to for everybody out there that's listening. We thank you.
MJ:I I just wanna do a shout out to my little nephew, Abel. I a couple weeks ago, I did a shout out to him about passing his welding exam. He actually just he actually just graduated, from his his welding class. So now he's gonna be pursuing his welding career. Just had an interview today, so I'm very proud of him.
MJ:I wanna do a shout out to my to my other little nephew, Noah, who graduated from high school going now now going to college. Very proud of you. Just wanna do shout out to you. And I wanna do shout out to, a lot of the our coworkers out there who have been really supporting our channel Definitely. And giving us that positive feedback.
MJ:Thank you, guys. Thank you, Jerry. Thank you, Chris. Thank you, guys, George.
AYD:All of you guys.
MJ:All of you guys. I just wanna say it's it's really, we appreciate you guys, like,
AYD:like real.
MJ:Yes, we really do.
AYD:We really do.
MJ:You know, you guys don't have to, you know, take the time to listen to us, and the fact that you guys do. They do.
AYD:Yeah, they do because we wanna listen to I am a lot.
MJ:Yeah, we
AYD:want to listen to us. Yeah, so yes, you have to listen to us. But what
MJ:you know what I'm saying. I'm I'm just saying I'm very humble and very grateful for you guys. So I just wanna say thank you.
AYD:Yes. We appreciate you.
MJ:But alright. Let's let's let's kick the let's kick things off. Well, matter of fact, before we start kicking off, how are
AYD:you doing? How's how's your current?
MJ:How's how's your how's your week? And do you wanna get
AYD:off your chest? My current right now is just, nice and smooth. Just, kicking back and enjoying the process. I'm enjoying the process. How about yourself, MJ?
MJ:You know what? This week was a bit a bit challenging. I had a bit a challenging week. But again, it's it's obstacles that we go into in in life and it's it's overcoming those obstacles, embracing the challenges.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:You know, and it's also taking accountability, for your actions. So, so, yeah, man. I just wanna remind everybody, you know, it's it's it's, take accountability for the things that you do. Work on yourself. Be productive.
MJ:But overall, the, my week my week has been very well, very well. Can't complain. I can't complain. Can't complain.
AYD:You know what? We woke up this morning.
MJ:Exactly. God is great. God is great. Alright.
AYD:But hold on. Before we get started, I have a question for you. You said your nephew just, graduated from welding school. Yeah. Yeah.
AYD:You're gonna have to, let me know what, what school that is, because my son wants to be a welder. Okay. So that'll be awesome. Hopefully, that's their pursuit of happiness, you know? So keep it up to your nephew.
AYD:Congratulations. You guys are amazing. That's awesome.
MJ:Yeah. So, yeah. I could definitely get you that info. Yes. You know, off camera.
MJ:You know what I'm saying? Off camera. But yeah, let's let's let's let's fucking let's get into it.
AYD:Alright. Alright. Let's get into it. Alright. Because I got a question for you.
MJ:Oh, man. Already busting out the hot topic. Alright.
AYD:Let's let's
MJ:let's do it. This I mean, the pursuit of happiness is kinda is kinda it's it sounds like an easy question, but it's it was I really had to think about it.
AYD:No. Same. Same here. I'll probably be stuttering, you know, so apologies. Yeah.
AYD:Because, you know, it's
MJ:I mean, we we we all think about happiness. We all kinda have interpretation of of what happiness is. But what is happiness? How do you define it?
AYD:That was my question to you. Yeah. What is your pursuit of happiness was my question to you.
MJ:Alright. So what's happiness to me? What what is again, I had I had to really think about it, but, happiness, Definitely it's a mindset. It's a mindset. It's an alignment, mind, body, soul.
MJ:There could be everybody has a different interpretation of what of honestly what happiness is. But I would definitely say that happiness, it's a mindset. It's it's the energy that you project not only towards yourself, but towards others. I don't
AYD:I don't
MJ:I don't know if there's ever been a time in your life where you kind of meet someone and you kinda you you don't you don't relate with their energy.
AYD:Oh, yeah. Yeah. This is it. All the all the time. You know, like Yeah.
AYD:All the time.
MJ:You know, you feel like like you don't they don't they don't have that positive energy.
AYD:Or their intentions aren't good. Like, you know that your their intentions are just not good. Just like their body language, the way they move or no. Yeah. Definitely.
AYD:That's it.
MJ:Yeah. Yeah. So, like, that's that's what I'm saying. Like, it's it's definitely something that we we manifest, you know, as as far as being being happy. And it's, it's something that you have to work on daily.
MJ:Oh, for sure. Yeah. Happiness happiness, it's it's work. It's it's a fucking
AYD:roller coaster. Yeah.
MJ:It's a roller coaster. Yeah. Because at one minute, you could be feeling great, and then something happens and you could be feeling low. So happiness, it's a challenge.
AYD:That part. And I'd rather stay on the high note.
MJ:Yeah. But but that honestly, to to go back to your question, happiness as as like I said, for for me, it's a mindset. It's how you treat other people. It's your energy. It's just your your your thought process, your your positive intentions towards towards people
AYD:Mhmm.
MJ:Even when those people have negative intentions towards you.
AYD:Towards you. Yes.
MJ:You know? And that's the hard part.
AYD:That is the hard part. But you can't take that personal. You know what I mean? You take that personal, then you start to wear that negativity. You start to absorb that negative energy, you know.
AYD:So, I mean, if that's the way they're feeling, allow them to feel that way. Allow them to just, you know, keep your distance and, you know, you don't need that in your life. I mean, I'm sure we're all going through something, you know, like, and we're all working through something and that's the last thing we need to deal with. Right. Right.
AYD:But, yeah, man.
MJ:So that's my simple answer to your question. So, AYD, you know, what is happiness to you?
AYD:Well, the pursuit to happiness for me, is having a goal and sticking to it. It's growth. It's, you know, becoming the person who I'm envisioning that I'm gonna be. You know what I mean?
AYD:To this podcast. You know what I mean? I have a great vision for this and I'm a put everything I have into this because that growth, that, you know, speaking to people and helping people, that's my happiness. You know what I mean? Allowing them to, allowing myself us to create a platform for them to talk and express themselves and maybe they just they feel that much better, just a little bit better.
AYD:And that's alright, we'll take it because it's it's a process, you know. And going through the process, you know, I feel the change. I feel I'm becoming a different person, you know, a better person, and, you know, it's making me happy. I feel I feel great.
MJ:Okay. That's that's a beautiful answer. So you you mentioned
AYD:That's a very manly
MJ:Manly answer.
AYD:Handsome answer.
MJ:But, you you mentioned people. Right? Do people have an influence on your happiness? Or or can they can people affect our happiness?
AYD:Oh, definitely.
MJ:And how so? Give me
AYD:Alright. I mean Give
MJ:me an example.
AYD:Give us an example. Yeah. Before, I used to allow people to get in my head and I would worry about everything that they're saying and, you know, maybe whether whether it's comments or if they're further feeling a certain type of way towards me, I would be stressing myself out, trying to think about why. Well, why? You know, how can I fix this?
AYD:But it's like, I didn't even do anything wrong, or I didn't do anything to make them feel that way. You know? So now it's like, I don't allow that, you know? I'm learning to block that out. I'm learning to not take it personally and not wear whatever they're going through because that's their opinion.
AYD:That's how they feel and, you know, I got other things, more positive things to worry about.
MJ:At what and at at what point did you started to realize, like, I need to not let these people negative negative people influence my my happiness?
AYD:When we started riding the wave when we started riding the wave, I constantly questioned, like, do I wear this mask? Do I do I sport it? You know, is it a bad deal? You know, I questioned everything, but it's like, it's for me. It's it's something that makes me happy.
AYD:It's something that's gonna help me grow. It's my process. You know what I mean? So I gotta wear it and, like Yeah.
MJ:I know. Because yeah. We people had a lot of feedback about about the mask, you know. Yeah. Everybody did.
AYD:Yeah.
MJ:Everybody did. But, like I told a lot of people and and like he told me, it's not for it's not for me. It's for you.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:And then we we all need to respect that in general when it comes to anybody.
AYD:Yes. Yeah. Definitely. Because I mean, eventually, I think I will take off the mask. But for now, I feel like
MJ:I gotta wear it.
AYD:Please leave it out.
MJ:Please leave
AYD:it out. Please leave it out. Please leave it out. No. I appreciate it.
AYD:Thank you for looking out because my wife will get upset with all the DM's I'll be receiving. Please, please. No. But on a serious note, like I have to wear it, you know, I have to be be 8 and once I get consistent with it and once I feel like I'm on a different level, then that's when I'll take it off. But right now, I have to put myself through this process.
AYD:Because if I don't, then I will not grow. I I feel like I won't grow. Yeah.
MJ:I I can definitely agree that our our surroundings have a huge impact on our happiness.
AYD:Yeah.
MJ:You know, when you're surrounded by positive people, you feel positive about yourself because you're gonna have a lot of positive feedback, a lot of positive responses compared to if you are surrounded by family or friends who have a lot of negative comments, a lot of negative feedback. And then it's like, it sucks, but a lot of us are prodigy in our environment.
AYD:Yeah. And imagine how much energy you gets, like, it, like, sucks out of you. Yeah. It's just so energy draining. And then by the time you're, like, you're finally like, okay, it's fixed.
AYD:It's like you have no energy to do anything. You just wanna relax. You just wanna, I don't know, take a nap for some people. Like, whatever your process is, it's just you don't wanna do anything that's gonna be
MJ:for you. And it's it's it's like why? That's always my my question to people who bring in that negative energy. It's like why? Why do you bring this negative energy?
MJ:Yeah. What is going on in your life? And and these are and this is a question to the people who who have negative energy. Because I know there I know you guys are out there listening. You're rolling your eyes like, oh, yeah, whatever.
MJ:But why do what what positive outcome do you get bringing in positive energy to your environment? Rather be your your your work environment, your home environment, your friendship environment, you know, like
AYD:What if that's just their personality?
MJ:Oh, man. Then that sucks. That sucks.
AYD:That's tough. That's tough.
MJ:That's tough. You know, like, there's just so many, you know, fucking haters out there, bro, who just wanna
AYD:see. Unfortunately, you know? Unfortunately, it's, but I mean, there's always time to change. That's the good thing, you know. You always have an opportunity every single day to do something different, to try something different, to do it different, to learn the lesson, to be in a better place.
AYD:Like you said, too high to have higher energy levels and vibrations and
MJ:So the people who are out there surrounded by, you know, that negative energy, I would say the best thing to do is if you can, cut them out cut them out. You know? You gotta sometimes we gotta walk away from that from negative people. And if that means family, friends, then
AYD:I'm cutting it off like they did my leg.
MJ:Yeah. Sometimes sometimes I'm
AYD:down there.
MJ:Sometimes we got you, bro. I know I know I know there's an order for us to reach that higher elevation in life, we gotta let the people that are holding us back, that don't wanna see us too good, we gotta let them go. Don't get me wrong. We also gotta use that as as fuel and and and and positive energy.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:You know, to, to excel, you know, because those those haters do bring that fuel.
AYD:Yeah. You know,
MJ:because I think if everybody wants to see people will succeed, I don't think you will have that like that, you know, like that feel that like that, that rage in a in a sense, a positive rage to to do certain to do certain things. You know? Tell me tell me something I can do, and and let me show you that I can.
AYD:No, exactly. And that's because they're at a different they're at a lower level, why they hate, you know? A lot I would say all the haters are at a lower level. Because to be honest, if you have somebody that's successful on and on a high level, you know, and I just heard this today. I forgot what it was on.
AYD:But, you know, if you're on a high level, somebody that's successful on a higher level will never hate on somebody that's on a lower level. Yeah. Because why? What would be the reason for it, you know? They're just on a different level.
AYD:Yeah. Yeah.
MJ:You know
AYD:what I mean?
MJ:I agree with that. I have another question. At what point did you realize you were unhappy? And when did you
AYD:Wait. Why do I have to be unhappy, bro?
MJ:I mean, we we I mean, we all we were all at what point unhappy, you know, but at what point did you kinda realize, like, man, I I'm unhappy? And when did you start to become happy? What when you start putting that work to
AYD:to be happy? I started being unhappy. I mean, I didn't realize it till recently when I allowed money.
MJ:Mhmm. My rat race, homie. The rat race.
AYD:I allowed money to control who I
MJ:am. The root of all evil.
AYD:No. For real. It really is. And because I was always wanting to be able to do what I want, when I want with my family and be able to provide and everything. And I was just so, like, consumed by I need to make more money.
AYD:I need to make more money. I need to make more money. I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. So it was like
MJ:And what do you think that stemmed from? Like, the whole money thing? Where do you think you got that idea from or that concept? Where did you learn it? Where did you learn it from?
AYD:I think that's how we were taught. We were never taught anything different, you know, just get a good job, make money, and the more money you make, the more you can do. And at at a point I thought like the more money you have, the happier you'll be. Yeah. Not it.
AYD:Not it at all.
MJ:Yeah. I mean, how many people that we know celebrities and all this, you know, are no longer here. They had it all all the money and everything, and it just still wasn't
AYD:take it with you.
MJ:Yeah. Still it's it still wasn't still wasn't enough. Yes. I mean, for myself well, what what changes did you make though? Like when when
AYD:I I stopped worrying about money. I will I will I, you know, put my faith in God, and I'm grateful for my family. I'm grateful for the friends that I have, you know, my support system. I'm grateful for my house. The fact that I was able to wake up, all my senses are still here.
AYD:I can see, smell, touch, feel, you know, taste. I'm grateful for everything, and that's that's all that's all I'm worried about right now. Like, money, if it comes, it comes. If it doesn't, it doesn't. I'm just gonna enjoy my life.
MJ:So when you hear that that comment, that word, it's like, and the money makes me happy.
AYD:Mhmm. Right?
MJ:Do you think it's just that that's a false
AYD:I mean, to each their own. Yeah. To each their own. Right? To each their own.
AYD:I mean, if they feel that money makes them happy, hey, by all means, if you love buying cars and, hey, that's your thing, like, make your money, I'm never gonna, like, do you, you know? Hell, yeah. I'll support you a 100%.
MJ:You know? Yeah. Man
AYD:I say that a lot. I say you know a lot. Yeah. You do. I think I see this.
AYD:Who do
MJ:you know? What do you what do
AYD:you Right.
MJ:Right. I'm asking
AYD:for that.
MJ:Who do you know? What do you know? Who do you know?
AYD:That's me. I guess so. Do you know what I'm saying?
MJ:I didn't have to nod when he says you know, you know.
AYD:I'm just like, okay. Okay. It's all good. Something else I need to work on. But yeah.
AYD:No. What about you? What about yourself, James? Like, what what do you feel makes you happy, MJ?
MJ:What makes me what makes me happy, number 1, is, you know, is my son. That dude, that kid makes me the best version of myself. You know, that's what really makes me happy. Being a father, you know, everybody has a calling or a purpose. You know, I feel like that's my purpose.
MJ:You know? So that's that's number 1 is is my son. But was I always happy? No. No.
MJ:I wasn't happy for a long time, man. I wasn't happy for, for a long time. What do you think, what was the cause of you feeling that you weren't, you weren't happy? You know, not having my dad around. I think not having my my dad may made me not feel happy because I missed him, you know?
MJ:So that was a struggle for me. And I knew he wasn't gonna come back and I knew the family that, we had wasn't never gonna be the same. So I struggled with that for a long time. And as I grew, you have to accept certain situations in your life. Mhmm.
MJ:And how to accept that. You know? Okay. How to how to accept it. And then, but once I got more stable in my life, like once I started like accomplishing my goals, getting my career, then I started feeling a lot better about myself.
MJ:And that started making me feel positive. You know, I went back to the boxing gym because I was overweight. In my early twenties, I was I was overweight. I think the most I was was like £200 and like 40. That was a big boy.
AYD:Bro, I can't break 200. Yeah. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.
MJ:I'm trying to.
AYD:I'm trying
MJ:to. No. I I was I was I was you know, mama's cooking. Mom was cooking, you know?
AYD:I'm definitely not gonna break 200. Yeah. But, yeah, definitely home cooked meals are the best.
MJ:Yeah. Mama's cooking. Just eating, eating, eating. And, but way out, man, once I once I got back into the boxing gym and just really started getting back into shape, started working on myself. Yeah.
MJ:That's when I started feeling better. You know, I started feeling better and I'm in a good place now,
AYD:you know? So what do you do on, like, a daily basis to start off the day to ensure that, hey, you know what? Today's gonna be a good day. Like, is there anything that you do specifically? I wake up.
AYD:I wake up.
MJ:God is great. That's number 1. You know, I wake up. I look around my place and, you know, it's it's not the greatest. It's not but, like, I'm very humble and very appreciative.
MJ:Yes. I go outside. I turn on my car. It turns on. It turns on.
MJ:I'm able to get to work. I I have a a great job. I have 2 great jobs. I work with a lot of great people.
AYD:Mhmm.
MJ:You know, I I do work with a lot of negative people at times, but I also work with a lot of great people. It comes with the territory. It comes with the territory. So that's pretty much what fills my day. And then when I have my son, when I turn over and I wake and I see his little face, that right there also is just like the biggest, and hearing little voice.
AYD:Deep breath.
MJ:Yeah, man.
AYD:Fresh air.
MJ:Like, it's just, it's it's a it's a beautiful feeling and it's always the small things. It's the small things in life that bring the bring us the most, fulfillment.
AYD:Oh, definitely. Yes.
MJ:You know? So, yeah, man. So that's pretty much with how I start stop my day. How about yourself?
AYD:Me, I start off, you know, thanks to my wife. You know, I gotta stretch more. So I start off with the good stretch. Oh, they say you
MJ:gotta stretch mark?
AYD:No. Where? I can't put on my weight. I can't put on my no. But, you know, I start off with the stretch and then, you know, I do go into the mirror and I Mirror mirror on the wall?
AYD:That part. Who is
MJ:the handsome my father maul?
AYD:Aid. No. And, I, you know, I say a prayer, say thanks to God every day. I'm grateful for everything that I mentioned earlier, you know, all my 5 senses. I stay humbled, you know, I talk to myself in the mirror.
AYD:Like, it really helps. Like, you're gonna be amazing. You're gonna be great. You know, it really helps. And it I start my day off really, really well.
AYD:Nice. So those are some of the tech the things I the techniques I use, you know, to start my day off.
MJ:And to the audience, what do you guys do? When you guys are waking up, how do you guys wake what I like to do too, bro, is I like to open up the curtains and just
AYD:Yes. Let some light in.
MJ:Let some light in. Yes. Like, I definitely, like, just get some sun, like, like, alright. Yes. Like, yes.
AYD:Because light will overcome The darkness, baby. As always. I believe that.
MJ:Cheers to that. That's a good one. That's a good one. Do you feel like we need relationships to make us happy? And I'm not talking about, like, relationships between, like, having a companion.
MJ:Mhmm. I'm just saying relationships in general.
AYD:In general? Do you need to be in a relationship?
MJ:Relation no. I'm not saying in a relationship, but the relationships. Like, do you like, rather it be with your community or or anything like that. Like, what what what is do you think that's a part of happiness?
AYD:Yeah. I believe it's a a part of happiness, you know, a good percentage of happiness. Do you need to be in multiple relationships with all that to be happy? No. A relationship with God, if, you know, if you're religious, you know, I feel that that relationship is all you need because you'll always be guided in the right direction, you know, and then everything else after that is a plus.
AYD:It's something that helps you even more, you know, growth. How about yourself?
MJ:Well, yeah. I I would say definitely, like that saying, like, it takes a village to to, build a child or or to raise a child. Mhmm. And I do A village? A village.
MJ:Yes. A village. And I and I and I and I'm not a true believer in that. I I believe that, isolation, we're social creatures just by habit. Yeah.
MJ:It's okay to spend time to yourself, get comfortable with yourself, but I don't think it's beneficial to spend too much time by yourself. And the reason why I say that is when you're just by yourself for for so long, you think all everything you're doing is correct. Mhmm. And when you have positive people in your life, they could make those adjustments for you. You know, we all need calibrate like, little calibration resetters in our life because there's a lot of times where I've I've even come to you, Aid, for some guidance, because I don't have the answers to everything.
MJ:We don't have the answers to everything. Do. You know, that and and that's why, you know, you you know, you go back 100 of years ago and then you you have the elders, you know, tell a story, tell an experience to to the younger kids, you know. So that's why I I do believe that we do need relationships, not be codependent on the relationships, but, you know, we do need to be independent, but I believe everything comes together. Yes.
MJ:You know? I just I I'm really not a big believer in just spending too much time by yourself.
AYD:Mhmm. Really? Yeah. I think that's when you
MJ:But I'm saying too much time.
AYD:I'm not
MJ:saying, like Not
AYD:at all.
MJ:We all need that. We all need that alone time.
AYD:Like Okay.
MJ:I mean, I spend a lot of time by myself, you know. But when I interact with people, it's like
AYD:Okay. So give me an example. What would be too much time by yourself, in your opinion?
MJ:Perfect example, people who are in prison and they're in solitary confinement and they're in their their that cell for 23 hours a day. That's that is cruel punishment in my opinion.
AYD:For them. No. But for I'm saying for you, what is too much time for you to be by yourself?
MJ:That's that's a you know, that's a good that's a good question.
AYD:Yeah. That's why I asked it. No. I'm just
MJ:Because honestly, man, like, I I try not to spend too much time by myself. And I don't really have a honesty, bro. I don't even know. Being a parent dog, like you don't really have time for yourself.
AYD:It's really hard. You gotta, like, find time for yourself.
MJ:But it's it's nice. Don't get me wrong. Like, it's nice when I do have time for my for myself. I do enjoy it and, you know, I go to the gym. I go on a hike.
MJ:I go out to dinner. So it's it's by myself. So it's nice. I'm com I'm comfortable being by myself. Like, there's no.
MJ:No. I I am comfortable.
AYD:Have you ever, like, driven to work with in, like, in just complete silence? No radio? No I have.
MJ:I I have.
AYD:How did you feel after you got to your destination?
MJ:Peaceful. You know, I lower I lower the window. The only thing I I wish I guess, I I I wish it was possible, there was no traffic. It was just me and the road. Uh-huh.
MJ:And that's it. That would be nice. That would be nice.
AYD:Okay. But you're in LA, so Yeah. We're not gonna happen. Ever. That's that's not gonna happen.
AYD:Unless you're driving, like, at 2, 3 in the morning.
MJ:Yeah. Okay. So let me let me ask you. What is the difference between and I want an example. Short term happiness and long term happiness.
AYD:Damn. Short term happiness would be, you know, me with the the missus in the bedroom, and it's just, you know A
MJ:little quickie here.
AYD:You know, a little fast finish. Sorry, babe. You know? I'll get you back. I'll get you back.
AYD:No. Short term happiness, and it's gone, you know, here and there. No. An example for a short term happiness, man, it is just that's a that is a tough quest Yeah.
MJ:Question. That's why I asked.
AYD:Yeah. You can't use your you can't use my stuff against me. Long term happiness, I'll go I'll get back to that
MJ:other one.
AYD:I'm a go long term happiness. But it's crazy how
MJ:us these simple questions are Because They're kinda a head scratcher because it's like you it really makes you have to think. Right?
AYD:Yeah. But I mean, because to be honest, sometimes it's like when do you really think for yourself?
MJ:I would hope you think.
AYD:I don't
MJ:have it. I mean,
AYD:yes. I think for myself, you know, I make my own decisions. But when do you have time to process exactly how you're feeling? You know what I mean? Like with everything that, we got going on, like everybody, you know, they got work, they got kids, they got Yeah.
MJ:But you should always take a little bit of time.
AYD:I would love to. Right? When's the last okay. So when's the last time you took a deep breath?
MJ:I'm taking a breath right now.
AYD:Oh, you're taking a breath, but when is the last time you took a proper like
MJ:Right now. I'm doing it right now in front of you.
AYD:Exactly. Right. Very funny. Okay. So tell me when's the last time you did that?
MJ:When's the last time I took an actual oh, shoot. Yesterday, actually. Yesterday. Okay. When I was talking to my my son's mom.
MJ:So I
AYD:was like But it's so great for you to take it's so great for the body to take deep breaths and we just forget to do it. You know what I mean? We forget to take that deep breath. So sometimes I forget to really process my feelings or what's going on because, you know, I got my kids, you know, got the wife, you know. I'm I'm thinking about everything, work, everything, you know.
AYD:It's just not specifically like them. Like, everything has a factor and then by the time the night is done, I'm ready to crash out, get ready for work.
MJ:Alright. So what's, again, what's short term and long term? You you're kind of
AYD:Short term. Short term happiness for me is My workout.
MJ:Okay.
AYD:My workouts.
MJ:Okay. Okay.
AYD:That's a good one. My short term happiness, my workouts. So it's like, I feel really good. I'm after it, you know, and then it's like once I get my pump, like, I'm done and it's gone.
MJ:Okay. And and what's and what's your long term?
AYD:My long term happiness is going to be is the person that I'm gonna be. You know what I mean? That's gonna be my long term happiness because as I grow, I'm gonna be happier and happier every every day as I get better at the process. Beautiful.
MJ:And to
AYD:the It's very manly.
MJ:And to the audience, what is short term happiness for you guys and what's long term?
AYD:Yeah. Let us know.
MJ:Let us know.
AYD:Let us know. I don't know why you're talking like that, but I can do
MJ:it too. I'm dying to know. And as far as myself, short term happiness, it's just in in living in that moment. You know, it's, going going to a baseball game.
AYD:Okay.
MJ:You know, going to a concert.
AYD:What kind of baseball game?
MJ:A dodger, baby.
AYD:Dodgers.
MJ:Go blue. So those are the short term moments where it's just you're you're in the moment, you're having fun, but then once it's you get in your car, it's like, all right, it's over.
AYD:Yeah. You
MJ:know? And the long term happiness for me, is definitely like my my mental health.
AYD:Okay. Yes. That's good.
MJ:My physical health, my relationship with with the Lord, my relationship with my son, my relationship with you guys, this podcast.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:You know, this is this is my long term happiness, you know, because
AYD:these to that.
MJ:Yeah, man. Because these these, you know, these moments are are always gonna be things that you and I could go back and reflect on. Definitely. You know, like, what it no one could take what we did away from us. And and and I'm so happy.
MJ:I'm so happy to be here with you
AYD:Yes.
MJ:Doing doing doing it is that we said we're gonna go out to do and fuck it, we did it. Get the ball rolling. You know, we got the ball rolling. And so this is my long term happiness. Long term friendship with you, you know, like, it's been 13 years.
AYD:Is it? I haven't been keeping Yeah.
MJ:I I keep count I have a calendar. Okay? I have I'm a little weird like I'm a little weird like that.
AYD:We like weird. We like weird.
MJ:But that is my my long my long term my long term happiness. What, like, adversities? Like, does does adversities make us happy?
AYD:What do you think?
MJ:For sure it does. Absolutely. I think I think when we're able to conquer obstacles, hell, yeah, it makes us happy because it makes it's like as I told you, I used to I used to bot Fox. I used to box. And in in boxing, there's times where you're sparring and you feel like you have nothing left
AYD:in that tank. Yes. Gotta dig deep.
MJ:And you fucking dig deep. Gotta dig deep. And then you find out who you You are. Really are as a person. Yes.
MJ:You know? So definitely adversity definitely brings the happiness in you. So that's I I would I would that's my example.
AYD:How about yourself? No. Definitely. Those are perfect. I think you hit the nail on the head with that one, you know, because I completely agree.
AYD:It's an accomplishment, you know, and it's, you just push through, like, when you're ready to give up, you keep pushing through and you really, really see what you're made of.
MJ:Yeah. And and to the audience capable of that. Yeah. And to the audience, like what adversities have you guys faced that has made you a happier person? Mhmm.
MJ:You know? I I we're definitely we're definitely curious to to, to hear your your your, you know, your response.
AYD:Yeah. You know? For sure. Drop a comment.
MJ:Drop a comment. Comment. Let me
AYD:know how you feel.
MJ:Like and subscribe, please, ladies and gentlemen. Like and subscribe. So what what advice does this say I'm I'm someone are you in a happy place right now is what I should ask first.
AYD:Do you
MJ:feel like you're in a happy place?
AYD:Yes. I feel like I'm in a yes. Definitely. I feel like I believe that I'm in a happy
MJ:place. Do you believe or you know? There's a difference. Do you believe or do you know? I think there's a difference.
AYD:I believe and know that I'm in a happy place.
MJ:So if I was somewhat struggling with with trying to be happy and I came up to you and I asked you, you know, A, I'm struggling with happiness. What experience or guidance would you be able to, express to to myself or to someone?
AYD:I would say it's a you problem. No. I'm just Goddamn. No. I definitely would not
MJ:say that.
AYD:It's you. Sounds like a problem for you. So No. I think I would start to, I would try to dig deep, you know, see what's what may be what may be preventing them from being happy. You know, talk to them a little bit, you know, get a feel for them and then just try to provide any advice, you know, let them know that, you know, everything's gonna be alright.
AYD:Everything's gonna be good. Like, there's a lesson to everything. We just gotta look for the lesson. We just gotta see what it is, pinpoint it, and then do something different. Because if you keep doing the same thing, you're gonna get the same results.
AYD:Definition of
MJ:insanity. Definition of insanity.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:But a lot of these things are, like, easier you know, you could do x, y, z, and so forth. But you know, you could do x, y, z, and so forth. But happiness, it's it's definitely it's it's work. You know. And and number 1, when when you're happy and or when you're trying to be happy and you can't do it on your own because you got you at times, you can't do it on your own.
MJ:And you gotta know when it's time to ask for help. Yes. You know, you really do.
AYD:Yeah. And for some it's hard.
MJ:It's hard.
AYD:It's hard to ask for help, but I mean
MJ:But you gotta sometimes we all gotta
AYD:put We gotta ask for
MJ:help. Our fucking pride to the side, our pride to the side because your happiness your happiness shows. And how does your happiness shows is how you treat yourself and how you treat others.
AYD:Yes, sir.
MJ:Like, you know you're a good person when you when you treat others with kindness and respect. And even when people treat you in a shitty way, you don't stick to their level. Because why? Because you're fucking you're too happy. You're too positive
AYD:Exactly.
MJ:To to lower yourself to that level. You know? So
AYD:It's kinda like a I'm rubber, they're glue.
MJ:Yeah. Yeah. But, alright, let's we're gonna be
AYD:Do you have any
MJ:A conclusion, let's let's let's like You know, give our final thoughts. We'll get our final thoughts.
AYD:And But not those kind of thoughts.
MJ:So, Abe, I was gonna I'm curious. I'm curious. What, in in your opinion, is the key to happiness.
AYD:Okay. So that's not your final thought. That was the question. Got it. Alright.
AYD:Well, what is final question. Yeah. In my opinion, what is the pursuit to happiness?
MJ:What is the key? Yeah.
AYD:The key to happiness? What are
MJ:the what are the layers?
AYD:For myself, because I can't speak
MJ:for others for myself.
AYD:It's to have to be mentally, physically, spiritually aligned with myself, to have my emotions aligned with my heart, to have a relationship with God, to have faith, to remain humbled, you know, because I, for a while, I don't think I was staying humble. And I got humbled really fast. You know what I mean? So to remain humble then focus on my goals, focus on what I want to accomplish and see and focus on what I want this lifetime to become.
MJ:Nice. That's a manly answer.
AYD:Is that better? Thank you. Yes. That's great. I appreciate that.
AYD:Same question to you.
MJ:I would say
AYD:That's a good question. That's a very good question. I would
MJ:say, definitely gratitude. Let's be thankful. Mhmm. Let's be thankful for what we have. Let's not compare ourselves to people.
MJ:Let's not, you see someone having, you know, this this car, well, I need to go out and get something better. Be grateful that you're that you fucking have a car.
AYD:That part. You know? Yes, sir.
MJ:Mindfulness. Forgive yourself, man. Forgive ourselves for everything that we've done wrong. As long as your when your heart is pure and you're and you really feel sorry and sorrow for the things that you committed and have done, that's all you can do.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:And you got just be mindful.
AYD:Yes.
MJ:Connection. Connection with your friends, your family, and your community. You know, like we have to we cannot always do happiness. It it it takes a lot, and it it doesn't just take one person. It takes a community.
MJ:Takes a foundation, in in my opinion. Again, these are just our our opinions. And I'm curious we are we're definitely curious to know your know know yours. Definitely. Self care.
MJ:Taking care of yourself.
AYD:Self health?
MJ:Self health.
AYD:Mental health, yes.
MJ:You know, eating right, exercising. No and no one's saying to be super ripped or or or on this crazy diet, but just be mindful of what you're putting into to your body. Getting some sun. Full. Yeah.
MJ:Like, just be just be aware.
AYD:Okay.
MJ:You know, that I feel like that's really, really important for that happiness.
AYD:Yeah. Oh, there's more.
MJ:Oh, yeah. There's a few. Okay. There's a few for me.
AYD:Alright. Very fine. Purpose.
MJ:We we all need purpose. Rather, it's through, education. Rather, it's through helping people, your children, your work. We all have to we all need something to wake up for and wake up to.
AYD:Yes. You know? Yes.
MJ:And then spiritual. Having a spiritual belief. And it does and and for some of the people who don't believe in god, it it doesn't have to be god. It could be the your the people who you believe the people around you, you know. It doesn't always have to be that higher being, you know, some people don't believe in that and that's fine, but just having some sort of spiritual higher belief and financial stability, I think financial stability is an important one.
MJ:Not this you don't have to be super rich or make
AYD:that
MJ:nothing like that, but just having a good stable financial stability, you know, is is is, it's very important.
AYD:Okay.
MJ:And the hard one more. One more. And this
MJ:is the hardest one. This is the hardest one for me. For you. Positive mindset. Positive mindset.
MJ:And why and if you're like, well, why is that hard for you? It's it's it's it's hard for me because when people want to see you fail and see you not do well, like, I I always wonder why. Yeah. You know, why do you guys want like, not you guys, but, like, why do people wanna see people feel like, why? But why
AYD:but why wear that? Why allow that to you know what I mean?
MJ:I get that. But I'm saying, like, I have to be honest and I have to be realistic. Like, we could say all these things, but we also, like, have to be realistic that not everybody's gonna be positive. Like, being positive mindset, it's something you have to train yourself.
AYD:Yeah. But you can't worry about everybody being positive. You can only just focus on sometimes yourself being positive. And if you try to help others, that's great. But if they I mean, you can only give so much energy to them.
AYD:If they don't wanna be positive, then, hey, you know what? I'm sorry then.
MJ:But that's where I struggle with. If I if I had if I had to be blunt with you in the audience Did you say blunt? Blunt. Not smoking a blunt,
AYD:but blunt.
MJ:Positive mindset. Yeah. You know, but working on it, we're gonna get better. Amen. Like, we're we're we're we're beings that that need, growth.
AYD:We
MJ:need water. We need sunlight and and we need, soil, you know? So, that's that's my list of of the keys keys to success, you know. Sorry. My mine's a little bit longer
AYD:than the last book. I mean, list. I wrote
MJ:a little novel over here.
AYD:It's all good. It's all it's great information. But,
MJ:but, yeah. Thank you guys for tuning in.
AYD:Yeah. But we gotta do the final thoughts sis. He's trying to cut it off. Oh man, I'm trying to cut it
MJ:off all quick.
AYD:Alright, so Your final thoughts, go for it.
MJ:Alright. Final thoughts. Happiness, it's not easy. It's not. But we can do it.
MJ:We can do it with our surroundings, what who we surround ourselves with Mhmm. How we interact with others. And most importantly, like, we just need to be good we need to be good to each other. Good to each other. Controlling our emotions, not being reactive.
MJ:You know, not being reactive. And if if we can do some those those simple things and respect one another, care for one another, there is there is no stopping that pursuit to happiness. So those are my final thoughts, 8. And they would have bang.
AYD:My final thoughts are for the subscribers, the listeners, for all of us, you know, especially the listeners, you got something that you're working on or goals that you've set for yourself, hit them. Knock them out. Them.
MJ:Bang them out.
AYD:Yeah. Bang them out if you want. But crush them. Definitely put in that effort. Put in that work.
AYD:Persevere. You're great. You got this. You guys are amazing. You guys can do this.
AYD:And also like subscribe. Shoot us your link so that we could go in and look at your page or, support you. I don't wanna say follow. That's kinda weird. I'm not following you.
AYD:But we, me and MJ can, go and support your page and, you know, spread the love because that's what we need to do. We need to, like MJ said, we need to be there for each other. We need to help each other out. We need to grow together. We need to have this unity and, you know, we can conquer anything, you know.
AYD:I mean, we're just there's power in numbers.
MJ:You know, we're stronger. We're stronger together than, you know, we're stronger united, you know Yes. Than separated.
AYD:So on that note, make sure you talk to your friends, family members, tell them to subscribe, tell them to check us out, you know. And if they have a story, we're more than welcome to listen to it. If they don't wanna be on riding the wave, you know, we can have them sit on the side, whatever, you know. We're here for you guys. We're here to listen.
AYD:Again, I've been blessed with big ears to listen.
MJ:Got a big mouth. Yeah. But anyways, but, no, thank you guys, for tuning in. Yes. Please, leave leave a leave a comment, subscribe, whatever, future conversations you want us to have, definitely let us know.
AYD:Leave a leave a crown for those kings and queens out there that are supporting us. Please leave a crown.
MJ:And, you know, this this this platform and we're and we're gonna sound like broken records. It's not only for us
AYD:It's for you guys.
MJ:But it's for you. And let's That's it. And and remember, let's stay dedicated or
AYD:Are you dedicated, bro? You just got your whole name and you got Are you dedicated? Are you dedicated? What are you drinking in there? I know.
AYD:I know. But we love you guys.
MJ:We'll see you guys next week.
AYD:Tune in. Riding the Wave. We appreciate you. Peace.
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